W.A.L.T recall events through the eyes of an animal.
Second Draft
The starving of the day
It was a lovely day, so my parents and I went for a walk around the river bank in the afternoon during September 22nd. Why? Because it was our favorite day to have fun, I was happy because I was in front of the herd, but my dad was in front of me, because he was the leader of the herd. I was going to celebrate something fun but suddenly as we were walking I smelled lions ahead of us. ‘
They were chasing me because I was the weakest then, BAM!!! As they dragged me into the water, suddenly a crocodile appeared and it wanted to eat me too. The lions and the crocodile were having a tug of war with me, the lion’s won. Then the lions pulled me as hard as they could, and they took me on to the dry brown grass. Oh no, they were about to eat me! Luckily I could see my herd coming to rescue me, then I went under my herd to keep safe. While my herd chased them away, I went back home with my parents.
I felt SO shocked that this day has came to me, it was a big day.
By Blessing
Hi Blessing I really like your story because it is interesting and I liked the bit that you said that your parents are walking down the river bank. But you need to work on more content in your story.
ReplyDelete